100+ Roasts That Hurt And Rhyme

Need a roast that actually makes an impact? Roasts that hurt and rhyme are the perfect way to put someone in their place, all while keeping it fun and quick.

Rhyming Roasts For Adults

Your brain’s so slow, it needs a GPS to find its way.
I checked your wallet, it echoed inside, even a moth took a look and cried!
They talk so much, but nobody cheers, their voice alone could bring us to tears!
He acts all tough, like he’s the king, but deep down, he’s scared of everything!
She talks too much, she must have no spine, just a pile of bones wasting my time!
His style’s so old, it belongs in a dive, is he stuck in the year 2005?
Their words are deep, or so they claim, but even a fish wouldn’t take that bait!
I heard their joke, but not a soul laughed, their comedy timing is stuck in the past!
Roses are red, violets are blue, I’d rather lose WiFi than listen to you!
He says he works hard, but let’s be real, even a snail could outdo his zeal!
She’s always late, always slow, even snails tell her to go!
They call it etiquette, but what a sight, chewing with their mouth open just ain’t right!
If we did a crime, I’d turn them in, ‘cause snitching on clowns is never a sin!
I heard their insults, but here’s the truth, even a toddler could roast better in youth!
They give a lecture, it’s quite the show, even Google asks them to keep it low!
Einstein’s IQ must be hiding in his hair, ‘cause smart ideas? There’s nothing there!
When you talk, all I hear is static and delay.
Your jokes are like expired bread, stale and hard to digest.
Can’t tell if your skills are lost or just a bad test.
Your ideas? Like a dead battery, they never last.
You look like you borrowed clothes from the past.
Your wit is like Wi-Fi with no connection, slow and poor.
I tried to see your point, but the view was a bore.
Thinking you’re sharp, but your edges are dull.
You act like a trophy, but I see you’ve got no gold.

Long Roasts That Rhyme

You walked in like you owned the place, but all I saw was a tired face.
Thought you’d be clever, thought you’d be bright, but you ended up wrong, try as you might.
Your hair’s a mess, and your shoes don’t fit, how did you manage to make it look like that bit?
You tried to act cool, so serious and mean, but the only thing scary was your unwashed jean.
The way you talk, oh, it’s so unwise, I bet even a toaster can give better advice.
You claim you’re a genius, you think you’re the best, but honestly, your brain is just a mess.
Acting all tough with your strong, bold stare, but your fashion choices are beyond compare.
In the game of life, you played your hand, but ended up getting stuck in quicksand.
You came in loud, your voice a sharp clatter, but your words made about as much sense as bad batter.
Your fashion’s a wreck, and your style’s in doubt, try finding something that doesn’t scream “shout!”
You claim you’re the king of the clever and bright, but can’t figure out how to turn on a light.
Always so loud, and always so bold, but your life’s like a story that’s never been told.
You walk like a boss, acting all grand, but your shoes can’t even take a solid stand.
You talk about plans, your goals are so high, but your actions show you’re just stuck in the sky.
Thought you’d impress with a quick little glance, but you look like you’re stuck in a perpetual trance.
You claim you’ve got skills, you claim you’ve got swag, but honestly, you can’t even make a grocery bag.
You laugh and you joke, but here’s the thing, you’re as charming as a broken spring.
Acting like a star, as if you’re the sun, but you’re more like a shadow—just no fun.
You think you’re a fire, blazing so bright, but all you’ve got is an awkward light.
You stand like you’ve conquered the land, but you can’t even handle your own hand.
Claimed to be smart, but never make the grade, in the school of life, you’re constantly delayed.
Tried to be funny, but your jokes always fail, like a ship with no sail, just lost in the gale.
Act like a leader, but follow the crowd. Your voice is weak, even when speaking loud.
Want to be a hero, but scared of your own shadow. In the field of life, you’re lost in the meadow.
Promised to be great, but you always fall short, the closest you get to winning is losing in court.
Dreaming big dreams but sleeping all day, when hard work appears, you always run away.

Good Roasts For Rap Battles

Your rhymes are weak, your flow’s out of place,
Step back, kid, you can’t keep up the pace.
Your style is weak, your jokes are tragic,
My savage roasts work like magic.
You claim you’re the one with the sharpest mind,
But I’ve seen smarter words from a stop sign.
You try to step up, but you’re just a joke,
Your flow so dry, it makes my throat choke.
Thought you could win this roast battle with your flashy style,
But your words are faker than a plastic smile.
Your rhymes are old, your lines are slow,
Get ready, ’cause I’m about to steal the show.
You tried to be cool, you tried to be clever,
But your rap’s so weak, it’s now or never.
Stepping up to me with all that pride,
But your rhymes are like water—they just can’t glide.
You thought you’d drop bars and blow my mind,
But all I hear is noise, I’m not blind.
You spit your verses with so much sass,
But they sound like they were written in a middle school class.
You think you’re the king, with that fake bling,
But your rap’s so bad, it makes my ears ring.
Rap skills weak, couldn’t even compete,
In a battle of rhymes, you’re destined to defeat.

Funny Roasts That Rhyme

You act like a boss, thinking you’re cool,
But you’re the kind of guy who’d lose at pool.
Your fashion’s a disaster, your style’s a mess,
Even your dog looks like it’s in distress.
You laugh at jokes that aren’t even fun,
You’re like the last in line, always on the run.
You say you’re a genius, always on top,
But can’t even find the way to the shop.
You think you’re smooth, with all that flair,
But you’re like a banana—no one can compare.
Your sense of humor is truly bizarre,
It’s like you’re trying too hard to be a star.
Your jokes are corny, your lines are fake,
If comedy was a race, you’d be last to break.
Your dance moves are weird, they don’t quite fit,
Like a robot stuck in a poorly made skit.
You call yourself “cool,” but the truth is clear,
You couldn’t be cool if you had a career.
You think you’re funny, but you’re out of luck,
Your humor’s like a prank, but it’s just stuck.

Funny Roasts That Hurt and Rhyme

Your hair’s a mess, your face’s in a frown,
It’s like you’re trying to bring the whole town down.
You act so cool, you act like a star,
But you’re just a car without a working tire.
You say you’ve got skills, you say you’re the best,
But the way you dress just fails the test.
You think you’re funny, but that’s all a lie,
Your jokes are like clouds—just floating by.
You talk about being smooth, oh what a sight,
But you’re more like a car with a busted light.
You act all tough, like you’re a big deal,
But you’ve got less bite than a meal without the meal.
You claim you’re the one who can run this show,
But you trip on your own feet wherever you go.
You say you’re a genius, you say you’re smart,
But it’s clear your brain’s just falling apart.
You think you’ve got swag, you think you’ve got grace,
But your fashion sense is stuck in the wrong place.
You claim you’re the one who can rule the stage,
But you’re more like a kid stuck in a cage.

Good Roasts That Rhyme For Roblox

You think you’re a pro, but your skills are a mess, just like your avatar’s outfit—full of distress.
Your gameplay’s a joke, you’re always lagging behind, trying to be a legend, but can’t even climb.
You’re stuck in the past with outdated gear, while I’m upgrading fast—now get out of here!
Your strategy’s weak, your moves never work, might as well be a noob in the server’s murk.
You claim you’re a builder, but your creations are trash, like a broken Lego set that’s ready to crash.

Good Roasts That Rhyme Clean

You’re like a puzzle piece that doesn’t fit, no matter how hard you try, you never quite hit.
Your style’s like a fad that’s long gone out of date, trying too hard, but it’s never great.
You talk a big game, but don’t play it too well, your ideas are stale, they have no story to tell.
You’re the kind of person who tries to impress, but end up just making a bigger mess.
You’re a one-hit wonder, but that song’s out of tune, your “cool” factor’s gone, just like a full moon

Short Roasts That Hurt and Rhyme

You’re like a broken pencil—pointless and thin.
Your best idea’s still stuck in the spin.
You act all tough, but it’s just a facade, your whole existence is kind of odd.
You’re a slow internet connection, always buffering when needed.
You say you’re a king, but you’ve never succeeded.

Good Roasts That Rhyme For A Girl

You act like a queen, but wear a crown too tight, making bad choices that just aren’t right.
weekends
She shops all day, swipes without care, but still cries, “I’ve got nothing to wear!”
New gadgets each week, yet she complains, but still can’t figure out basic domains!
She went jogging just for the ‘Gram, ran two steps, then took a tram!
Dieting hard, counting each bite, but sneaks in cake when out of sight!
Her short hair’s bold, she says it’s cool, but now she looks like she’s late for school!
Long hair flowing, she thinks it’s divine, but it takes three hours just to untwine!
Earrings so big, they shine so bright, I swear they double as satellite lights!
High heels on, walking with grace, then one wrong step—flat on her face!
She loves movies, says she’s a fan, but sleeps through the whole film—what a plan!
Weekends are wild, she claims she’s fun, but sleeps all day and gets nothing done!
You think you’re unique, with that look you rock, but everyone knows you’re just a cheap knock-off.
Your confidence is strong, but your style’s a disaster, might want to rethink that outfit, faster.
You talk about grace, but you trip every time, maybe it’s time for a fashion rewind.
You’ve got a loud voice, but your words don’t make sense, your logic’s a mess, it’s all just pretense.
She checks the mirror, strikes a pose, but it still can’t fix that nose!

Roast Poems and Roasting Lines That Rhyme

“Hey, diddle, diddle, the cat and the fiddle, your brain’s so small, it fits in the middle.”
“Roses are red, violets are grey, your jokes are so bad, they ruin my day.”
“Twinkle, twinkle, little star, your logic’s a mess, it won’t get far.”
“Baa, baa, black sheep, have you any skill? No, sir, no, sir, you never will.”
“Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall, but even he thinks your sense makes no sense at all.”

Words That Rhyme With Exist

You think you’re a genius, but your skills don’t persist.
Your jokes are so dry, they hardly even twist.
Keep talking like that, and you’ll soon be dismissed.
You’re stuck in the past, just trying to resist.
Your fashion sense? It doesn’t even exist.

Words That Rhyme With Battle

Your skills are as weak as a wet paper paddle.
You’re the type to lose a fight over a trivial cattle.
Your thoughts are muddled like a broken rattle.
Can’t even win a race against a slow-moving shuttle.
Your logic’s like a basketball game with no dribble.

Words That Rhyme With Stupid

You’re acting tough, but it’s all so stupid.
You’re so slow, even a sloth says, “Stop it!”
Can’t even do math, your brain’s in a loop, kid.
Your strategy’s a mess, that plan’s quite stupid.
Your wit’s as sharp as a dull spoon, it’s twisted

Words That Rhyme With Insane

You think you’re on fire, but you’re just plain insane.
Your mind’s a maze, with no one to explain.
Try to keep up, but you’re stuck in the rain.
You try to act cool, but it’s just a strain.
That logic you use? It’s just a wild claim.

Words That Rhyme With Dumb

You act like a champ, but you’re just feeling numb.
You’re lost in thought, but there’s no outcome.
Your dance moves look like they came from a bum.
It’s hard to keep up when your brain’s so dumb.
You’re slow as a sloth, outpaced by a crumb.

Words That Rhyme With Ugly

Your sense of style is as ugly as a muggy day.
You keep talking, but your words go astray.
Your attitude is like a storm—ugly in every way.
You’ve got a face for radio, that’s what they say.
Your smile’s more crooked than a broken sleigh.

Words That Rhyme With Trash

You’re acting tough, but your skills are flash.
That attitude of yours? It’s just plain brash.
Your brain is so slow, it needs a crash.
Keep flexing, but your chances just splash.
You’re a joke, more like a corny flash.

Words That Rhyme With Drugs

Your brain’s so fried, it can’t deal with bugs.
You act like a legend, but you’re stuck in the ruts.
Your thoughts are hazy, just like bad hugs.
At life’s race, you’re behind by tons of lugs.
Your ideas? They’re stuck in old slugs.

Roses Are Red Roasts

Roses are red, violets are blue, your game’s so weak, I feel bad for you.
Roses are red, your wit’s full of gaps, your moves on the court are just full of laps.
Roses are red, your jokes are a mess, you think you’re a legend, but you’re second best.
Roses are red, but your style’s a disgrace, you act like a winner, but you can’t keep pace.
Roses are red, your mind’s stuck in the past, you keep acting like a champ, but you’ll never outlast.

Conclusion

When you need a roast that really sticks, roasts that hurt and rhyme won’t disappoint. They’re simple, sharp, and always hit the mark. Isn’t it?

FAQs

How do you come up with good rhymes?

To create good rhymes:

Choose a word and list its sounds.
Use rhyming dictionaries or online tools for ideas.
Think about the context of your rhyme.
Focus on simplicity to make the rhyme flow naturally.
Use words with similar endings for catchy rhymes.

Savvanah Blaze

Savvanah Blaze is a master of wit and humor, bringing sharp comebacks and clever roasts to every conversation. With a background in directing and writing comedic short films, she knows how to craft the perfect punchline. At GOOD ROAST, she shares the best funny roasts and witty replies for any situation, making sure you’re always ready with the perfect comeback.