170+ Good Roasts To Burn Your Friends & Family Members 2025

Have you ever been in a conversation and wished you had the perfect roast ready to go? Sometimes, the best comebacks don’t come to mind until it’s too late, leaving you kicking yourself for missing the opportunity. Well, no more! Here’s something cool: humor, even sharp or teasing, can actually bring people closer. A study found that shared laughter helps build stronger bonds. That’s why roasts aren’t just insults—they’re clever, well-timed roasting jokes that everyone can enjoy (when done right, of course).

This guide is packed with the funniest, most savage roasts to make sure you’re always ready with a killer comeback. You can use these lines to joke with friends or to come up with a quick comeback in an argument.

What Is a Roast?

A roast is a witty insult designed to entertain, not hurt. It’s meant to be playful and humorous, making everyone—including the target—laugh. When it comes to comedy roasts, their history is much clearer. Roasting has been around for centuries, from court jesters making fun of royalty to modern-day Comedy Central roasts.

The first official roast happened in 1949 at the New York Friars Club, where comedians playfully mocked each other in good fun. You can check out the detailed history of roasts on Vulture.

The key rules of a good roasting is creativity, timing, and knowing where to draw the line.

How To Roast People?

Roasting isn’t something everyone’s born good at, but with these tips, you’ll be dropping great comebacks in no time:

Know Your Audience: Make sure your roast fits the person and the situation. What’s funny to one person might not work for someone else.
Keep It Light: Don’t go too far—roasts should make people laugh, not feel bad.
Be Clever: Get creative with wordplay, comparisons, or humor to make your roast stand out.
Timing Is Key: A well-timed roast always hits harder than one that feels out of place.

170+ Good Roasts To Use Anytime

Here’s a collection of roast jokes ranging from funny to hilariously savage. You can use to roast for siblings(brother & sister)!

Funny Roasts

I tried to listen to you, but my brain filed for an emergency shutdown.
I look at you and wonder how one person can manage to be both a hero and a villain in their own life story.
You bring everyone so much joy… when you leave the room.
You have something on your chin… no, the third one down.
You’re like a cloud. When you disappear, it’s a beautiful day.
I can’t believe you’re still talking after all this time, but hey, at least you’re consistent.
I don’t always judge people, but when I do, I make sure you’re at the top of my list.
I was going to ask if you’re lost, but then I realized you’re probably just trying to find your way back to reality.
Your secrets are safe with me. I never even listen when you tell me.
You’re like a phone with no Wi-Fi—completely useless.
You have something special… it’s called bad timing.
Your sense of direction is so bad, you’d get lost in a straight hallway.
You’re like a sandwich without bread—confusing and incomplete.
Even a broken clock gets it right twice a day. What’s your excuse?
Your social skills are like a Wi-Fi signal in the woods—nonexistent.
I’m not saying you’re slow, but I’ve seen sloths with better urgency.
I can’t tell if you’re genuinely confused or just pretending for entertainment.
You’re like a cloud on a sunny day. Totally unnecessary.
Your jokes are like your dancing—awkward and hard to watch.
You’re proof that life doesn’t come with instructions.
Your fashion sense screams ‘laundry day’ every day.
Isn’t it amazing how you can say so much without actually contributing anything?
Some people bring joy wherever they go; others, whenever they go.
Ever notice how the most intelligent conversations happen when you’re not involved?
If ignorance is bliss, you must be the happiest person alive.
Ever wondered what life would be like if you had the ability to think before speaking?

What Are Some Good Roasts For Friends (Because We Love Them Anyway)

You’re like a cloud. Everyone’s happy when you’re gone.
I’d agree with you, but then we’d both be wrong.
You bring everyone together… to complain about you.
I’m not saying you’re ugly, but I can’t look directly at you without feeling concerned for my eyesight.
I’m glad we’re friends. I wouldn’t want you to be alone in the world of confusion.
You have something on your face… it’s called stupidity.
If you were any slower, you’d be moving backward.
You’re like a safety cone—bright, loud, and in everyone’s way.
You have a face for radio and a voice for mime.
Your laugh sounds like a car trying to start on a cold morning.
You bring chaos wherever you go—like glitter, but less fun.
Doctors probably use your X-rays as an example of what an empty skull looks like.
You’re like a selfie stick—useful, but nobody really likes you.
You’re the kind of person who claps at the end of movies. Alone.
You’re like my phone on 1%—barely hanging in there.
You’ve got something on your mind… oh wait, it’s nothing.
The way your logic works, even a compass would get lost trying to follow it.
You’re like a boomerang that never comes back.
Walking next to you feels like a side quest in a game I never wanted to play.
You’re my favorite person to blame when things go wrong.
Some drink from the fountain of knowledge; it seems you only gargled.
If brains were taxed, you’d get a refund.
Some bring happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go.
If wit were a currency, you’d be bankrupt.
I’d agree with you, but then we’d both be wrong.
Your secrets are safe with me; I never even listen when you tell me them.
I may love to shop, but I will never buy your nonsense.
Someday you’ll go far… and I hope you stay there.

Best Roasts Comebacks For Any Situation

Here I am creating a list of the best roast ever comebacks that you can enjoy after reading.

You’re proof that not all experiments succeed.
You have something in common with a cactus—prickly and hard to handle.
I don’t need to insult you; I can just sit here and let your existence speak for itself.
I look at you and think, “Is this real, or am I dreaming?
I can’t decide whether to talk to you or just pretend you’re not here to save us both the trouble.
I would’ve given you a piece of my mind, but I’m pretty sure you wouldn’t understand it.
I used to be interested in what you had to say, but then I remembered that my time is valuable.
You’re like a black hole. You suck the fun out of everything.
Your ideas are like pennies—nobody wants them.
You’re the human version of autocorrect—always wrong.
You’re like a snowflake—unique, but melting under pressure.
The last time you had a good idea, it was probably someone else’s.
Your life is like a soap opera—dramatic and hard to take seriously.
You’re like a vending machine that’s out of order—completely useless.
The only lifting you’ve ever done is dragging people down.
Your comeback game is weaker than decaf coffee.
You’re the Wi-Fi signal of friendships—unstable and hard to connect with.
If fashion disasters had a ranking, congratulations—you’re in first place.
You have something on your chin. No, not that one, the other one.
Your only flaw is that you have too many flaws.
You’re like a broken pencil—completely pointless.
A blackboard with years of chalk dust still makes more sense than your entire existence.
You’re proof that mirrors can lie.
You’re like a slinky—not good for much, but fun to push down the stairs.
I’d give you a nasty look, but you’ve already got one.
If I wanted to hear from an idiot, I’d watch reality TV.

10 Most Savage Roasts (But Stay Funny)

You’re like a software update—no one wants to deal with you.
Standing next to you lowers my IQ the same way standing next to a microwave kills brain cells.
Your opinions are like expired milk—nobody wants them.
If stupidity were a video game, you’d have unlocked all the achievements.
You must have been born on a highway, because that’s where most accidents happen.
Talking to you is like watching a tutorial with no skip button—painfully slow and pointless.
You’re like a cloud of mosquitoes—annoying and impossible to ignore.
Your brain is like a web browser—too many tabs open, but none of them work.
You bring people together because no one wants to be stuck with you alone.
If you were a TikTok trend, you’d be the one everyone regrets participating in.
You’re like a password—impossible to figure out and utterly useless.
Your confidence is inspiring. Your talent? Less so.
Your presence is like a printer error—no one knows why it happens, but it ruins everything.
You’re the human version of a participation trophy.
Even 7-Eleven closes sometimes, but your stupidity is open 24/7.
Your best quality is that you make everyone else look better.

Roasts For People You Dont Like

You’re proof that not all experiments succeed.
You have something in common with a cactus—prickly and hard to handle.
The way excuses roll off your tongue, you should be a politician.
Your breath smells like it has been in quarantine for too long.
You’re like a black hole. You suck the fun out of everything.
Your ideas are like pennies—nobody wants them.
The only six-pack you’ve ever seen is in the fridge.
If brains were nuts, you’d be the empty shell left behind.
You’re the human version of autocorrect—always wrong.
You’re like a snowflake—unique, but melting under pressure.
Your life is like a soap opera—dramatic and hard to take seriously.
You’re like a vending machine that’s out of order—completely useless.
Your comeback game is weaker than decaf coffee.
You’re the Wi-Fi signal of friendships—unstable and hard to connect with.

Creative Roasts

You’re like a lighthouse on a sunny day—completely unnecessary.
The only running you’ve ever done is out of excuses.
Your sense of humor is like a dead battery—flat and uninspiring.
A mirror cracks itself just to avoid showing your reflection.
Your face is like a Picasso painting—confusing, distorted, and hard to look at for too long.
You’re a walking reminder that not everyone should try.
If someone played connect-the-dots with your acne, they’d end up drawing a tragedy.
Your comebacks are so slow, they arrive by snail mail.
You’re like a firework that never goes off—just a big dud.
Your presence is like a commercial break—annoying and unavoidable.
You’re like a pizza without toppings—disappointing and plain.
You’re the human version of buffering—always lagging behind.
You’re like a floppy disk—outdated and irrelevant.
Your charisma is like a broken clock—nonexistent.

Roasts For Every Occasion

Like a rain cloud at a picnic, sometimes you bring unexpected surprises.
Your thought process moves slower than a treadmill set to zero.
Challenges are like spam mail; they test your focus but can be filtered out.
You’re like a bad haircut—it’ll take time for people to get over you.
Your ideas are like reruns—nobody’s excited to see them again.”
Your jokes hit harder than your punches – not saying much, though.
You’re proof that evolution can take a coffee break.
If you were any slower, you’d be moving backward.
This dish is an experience – mostly traumatic.

For Food and Cooking

Did you burn the recipe along with the food?
I didn’t know salt could be offended until it met this meal.
KFC’s ice cream machine has a better success rate than your life decisions.
If “edible” had a bare minimum, this is it.

For Appearance or Style

That outfit is so loud it needs its own mute button.
Your sense of fashion was probably downloaded on dial-up.
If makeup could talk, it would file a restraining order against you.
You dress like someone who’s lost a bet with themselves.
Your gym membership is just a donation at this point.
Those shoes didn’t choose you; they gave up.

For Academic And Smart Roasts

You must’ve been homeschooled by Netflix.
If brains were measured in bytes, you’d be a floppy disk.
Your ability to miss the point is truly unparalleled.
You’ve got all the answers, just none of the questions.

Classic Roasts That Never Fail

You must’ve been homeschooled by Netflix.
If brains were measured in bytes, you’d be a floppy disk.
Your ability to miss the point is truly unparalleled.
You’ve got all the answers, just none of the questions.

How To Craft Your Own Roasts?

Here’s how to come up with your own roasts:

You can compare someone to something funny or unexpected. Example: “You’re like a math problem. Nobody likes solving you.”

The best roasts aren’t one-size-fits-all—they’re the ones that hit close to home (in a funny way, of course). Focus on the person’s quirks—like always being late, their over-the-top coffee order, or their constant talk about a new obsession.

For example:

“Oh, you’re late again? Don’t worry, we’re just grateful you graced us with your presence at all.”

“That coffee order is longer than a CVS receipt. Are you sure you even like coffee?

“You’re like a traffic jam—annoying and unnecessary.”

You should avoid topics that could genuinely hurt someone’s feelings.

Know the difference between teasing and bullying.
Avoid mocking disabilities.
Never joke about someone’s suffering.
Consider the setting and audience.
Respect boundaries when asked.

Roasts Vs. Roast Lines

Here, I am giving you an example of both roasts and roast lines below;

Roasts

The overall act of joking or teasing someone in a fun way. For example: Even autocorrect gives up on your texts. Your conversations are like a dial-up connection—slow and painful to get through.

Roasts lines

The specific one-liners or jokes used during a roast to poke fun at someone. For example: Some roast lines to roast your friends. You bring everyone so much joy when you leave the room. You’re like a black hole. You suck the fun out of everything

Conclusion:

Good roasts are all about finding the right balance—funny, clever, and good-natured. With these roasts, you’ll always have a playful comeback or a witty jab ready to go. Just remember to keep it light, be mindful of others’ feelings, and enjoy the laughs. Roasting should always bring smiles, not discomfort. Happy roasting!

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FAQS

What does roasting someone mean in real life?

Roasting is playfully teasing someone in a funny way, usually to make people laugh without hurting feelings.

How do you make a great comeback?

A good comeback is quick, clever, and matches the tone of the situation—funny, not mean.

How can you come up with comebacks faster?

Stay calm, listen carefully, and think of something funny or smart about what was just said.

Are roasts and insults the same?

No, roasts are playful and funny, while insults are mean and meant to hurt feelings.

What’s a roast that can make someone cry?

A strong roast is witty, surprising, and relatable—but keep it fun, not hurtful!

What if their comeback is better than yours?

Laugh it off and enjoy the moment—it’s all part of the fun! You’ll think of something better next time.